On the matter of state funerals

[flewellyn]

I was thinking about the hoopla surrounding Reagan's death, and how his state funeral instructions were reportedly
300 pages long. I've decided that, if I ever were to become President, my state funeral instructions would be
much shorter: a page or two, at most.

In fact, I think I'll lay them out right now.

• Build giant catapult facing the Chesapeake Bay.



• Stuff corpse with explosives.



• Launch.



• Enjoy the fireworks!

My other option was to have the corpse emptied by a taxidermist, then filled with candy and toys, so that lots
of little children could play pinata.

Comments

[onegrain.livejournal.com]

sorry, i cannot wax eloquent as i'm much to busy LMAO. thank you very much. being amused makes me happy.

[neintales.livejournal.com]

I'd like to be twanged into a tree.

[limpingpigeon.livejournal.com]

I think I prefer the pinata idea to the exploding corpse idea. Once you've seen one exploding corpse, you've seen them all, and eventually it stops being cool and just seems messy and smelly.

[momily.livejournal.com]

Ewwwww.

[stuntviolist.livejournal.com]

That would be the perfect Halloween Pinata! (Be careful in October).